I can’t believe the first decade of the new millennium ended almost a decade ago. I also can’t believe how many films I bought on DVD from the decade…until I watch them and re-experience how much fun some of them were. So here’s a look at two from 2005 and two from 2006.
DEMONIC (aka: Forest of the Damned) (2005)
This is an early indie film from director Johannes Roberts (The Strangers: Prey at Night, 47 Metres Down, Storage 24, The Other Side of the Door), and while it’s a little artsy and unhinged, it’s kind of awesome…because it’s a little artsy and unhinged.
You know the drill: a group of friends on a road trip in the country, a crazy dude warns them to stay away, they keep going, they have an accident on a deserted road, they split up…
And then comes a mermaids of the woods plot. Everyone starts getting seduced by hot naked babes who turn into my favorite kind of demon mouthed freakozoids just when things are at their sexiest.
I just love the eerie erotic vibe, and whenever the demon women come creeping out of the dark, it’s perfectly spooky.
However, it does take a long time before they really start the cock blocking kills.
The time leading up to it is filled with a side plot involving Tom Savini that I really didn’t get—or maybe I just didn’t want to try? I mean, you know it’s serious if I’m choosing naked chicks over Tom Savini when it comes to what excites me in a movie.
The last half hour is so demonlicious, with sex, scares, and gore that I just couldn’t wait to get to it. The biggest disappointment for me is that this moment…
doesn’t make it into the movie—it’s an unfinished clip in the deleted scenes on the DVD.
The director of Headspace has only one other horror film under his belt—Offspring, which stars Pollyanna McIntosh, who also happens to appear in this film. Personally I prefer this film. I never would have guessed she’s a bottom, but that’s her under there…
also becomes obsessed with beating a master chess player who challenges people to games in the park, including a fierce queen who always has a dirty come back.
That’s when the people the main guy comes in contact with start dying.
We are shown right off the bat in some great, suspenseful death scenes that the killer seems to be some sort of demonic creature.
The film is a bit slow, but the kills make it worth it, as does the cast, which includes the likes of Dee Wallace, Larry Fessenden, Sean Young (Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde), William Atherton (Grim Prairie Tales, Ghostbusters), Olivia Hussey (Black Christmas), and Udo Kier.
The film is one of those that makes you wonder, is it all in the main guy’s head? Is he the one actually doing the killings? Does it matter when the demon we eventually see is so fricking awesome?
I didn’t exactly remember much of the film before the re-watch. At first I was wondering why I ever bought it and even thought for a while that I might get rid of it once I finished. But by the end I realized why it’s a keeper.
THE 7 (2006)
Following the success of The Descent, monsters in caves became a thing for a while in the 2000s.
The 7 goes the old students on a geology field trip route. Why don’t these kids ever learn that you should simply never go on a geology field trip? Although I shouldn’t talk, because while in college in the 90s I totally went on a geology field trip.
The usual personalities are present, some kids go off to have sex once they get in the caves, one kid causes problems with the teacher, and then people start dying.
There’s a lot of running, screaming, fighting, and shadows and sounds of the creature, plus some gory aftermath each time, but we don’t get to see the creature until the very end.
That’s actually unfortunate, because it looks cool and isn’t CGI. Sort of looks like a giant bat.
More monster could have made this one a bit more compelling than it is. And you have to wonder why they could give us a practical effects creature but yet insult us with…this…
BLACK SHEEP (2006)
If you like zany, gory, comedy horror like Dead Alive and Bad Taste, I can’t imagine that you wouldn’t like Black Sheep, which is pure midnight madness, although it isn’t as gross-out oriented as those other films.
Genetic experiments in farmland cause sheep to start attacking and eating people.
If you get bit by one and live, you turn into a sheep monster.
Like, why do I even need to say anything else? This one sells itself.
There are little deformed lambs, driving sheep, body parts turning into sheep on those who have been bitten, flesh torn apart, herds of sheep chasing humans, a tough old lady with a gun, and a final awesome boss battle…in which a sheepdog does half the work.