It’s a trio of slashers with juicy kill scenes. But is that enough?
HOUSE OF DOLLS (2023)
This slasher has Dee Wallace, a killer in a spiked pink ski mask, vicious slashing, and a great opening scene.
Unfortunately, we have to contend with the rest of the movie in between.
Three estranged sisters reunite to collect an inheritance, get stuck inside a distinctly designed house with some other people, and eventually start getting killed off one by one.
In the meantime, numerous random people are brutally killed in locations other than the house. I can honestly say I am not sure what the connective thread was in all these murders, but when the kills are this satisfying I don’t really care.
However, as a result, I wasn’t engaged in the movie at all when someone wasn’t being slaughtered. The final girl gets a chase scene, but the final battle kind of made me laugh, and I imagine that’s not what they were going for.
HORNY TEENAGERS MUST DIE! (2024)
With a title like this, plenty of raunchy sex and nudity, brutal and bloody kills, and the killer even using dildos and vibrators as weapons, it’s astounding that we end up with a slow, bland movie.
The opening sex and kill scene is just nasty in concept, and includes gore and some boy booty. Awesome.
There’s also a freaky little figure in the shadows that never appears again. Bummer. Missed opportunity. The whole movie should have been based on this eerie presence.
Next we meet a group of pretty unlikable friends heading to a cabin in the woods. We get the usual infights, teen drama, and sex, including a couple into pegging.
Brace yourself. The first kill isn’t until 38 minutes in. The violent kills pile up as the film progresses, but there is no effort here to deliver scares, suspense, or chase scenes, and the killer is never seen, so there’s no masked killer.
In the end, the killer motivation speech, which attempts to present something new to the slasher genre, is an eye-roller, especially since the glass ceiling has been shattered on this twist again and again for decades.
MASSACRE ACADEMY (2021)
For me, this is by far the winner of my latest marathon of indie slashers. Oddly, it feels like it’s supposed to be a sequel. The plot revolves around the final girl from a killer clown massacre two years ago. Believed to be dead, the clown is suddenly back for more!
Another odd thing about the film is that despite it taking place in 1987 and there being loads of references to 80s music and movies, the majority of the kids look more like they came out of an early 2000s slasher rather than kids living in the 80s. That makes it weird that there’s one bimbo who is as 80s as it gets, with neon spandex, teased hair, heavy eye shadow, and a cassette tape earring!
Her presence is kind of jarring because it sticks out like a sore thumb. And actually, the 80s aspect doesn’t matter much aside from serving as an excuse for there to be no cell phones.
People start getting gruesomely killed, leading surprisingly early to a total massacre at a college pledge party. It’s super bloody, campy, and funny, with 80s-style horror lighting and practical effects. I was afraid the movie was blowing its load too early and wouldn’t be able to sustain that level of fun for the rest of its run time.
There’s a shift after that, and it becomes all about the main girl and a detective trying to stop the killer. Although the setting tends to meander instead of staying focused on one location, there’s never a dull moment, with tight editing and camerawork. This is a crucial element that many indie directors fail to understand or deliver—they don’t “choreograph” their scenes to add excitement to the footage they film, instead just stringing together the scenes they captured on camera into a lifeless movie experience. Storyboarding is your friend.
Other highlights include a budding lesbian relationship with some kick-ass lesbians, suspense, excellent slasher atmosphere and a dark tone balanced by some clever and witty lines, and an action-packed final battle with the killer.
