It’s a trio of indie flicks with cannibals, masked killers, and even some signs of the supernatural. As a bonus, we get a final gay!
THE BOATYARD (2025)
This is as paint by numbers as a cannibalistic crazies movie gets, with absolutely no genuine horror thrills to be had. However, the film stands out for two reasons. First, horror daddy Mike Ferguson has a blast playing a psycho.
Second, we get a Black final gay guy, which lands this one on the does the gay guy die? page.
A group of friends goes out on a boat. They party for a while, complete with some girl-on-girl action. Not that the girls have much choice since there’s only one straight guy and one gay guy with them. The boat dies. The group calls for help.
Mike Ferguson comes to their rescue and takes them to…an island? His hotel in the middle of nowhere? I’m not sure, but wherever it is, there is absolutely no one else around beyond the friends, Ferguson, and the creepy man and woman that run an empty bar next to wherever it is that Ferguson sets the friends up with rooms.
After another partying montage, the friends retire for the night. Once alone, the gay guy is all ready to jerk off when he thinks he hears someone in his room.
And then, the friends begin getting abducted one by one. They are thrown in prison cells. Some are killed. Some are eaten. Some fight back.
The gay guy eventually runs into another gay dude who seems to come out of nowhere and offers to help him save his friends. But first…
There’s some gore and violence, but we don’t get any kind of suspense, tension, or atmosphere. Even the music disappoints, sounding like the kind of dramatic action music you hear during the cutscenes in a Resident Evil video game. I would know since I just finished revisiting RE3 the other day.
There is a reason for the killings (it’s one you’ve heard many times before), plus we get a hokey ending that sets things up for a sequel.
THE JOLLY MONKEY (2025)
I found this one to be highly entertaining as far as cheesy slashers go. The killer is dressed like one of those cymbal-crashing monkey toys and wears a monkey mask that is so goofy it morphs into looking ghoulish, and the kills are pretty dang gruesome.
A family inherits a motel, but they’re split in their opinions on what to do with it. And soon after, they start getting split by the killer.
One of those monkey toys begins popping up in various places, and when it does, the person that finds it is stabbed to death and has their face peeled off by the killer. Eek!
There are some cheap scares, good atmosphere and chase scenes, and twists and turns as the family tries to figure out a way to escape the killer. The ghost of a former victim even makes an appearance as the final act picks up.
The killer reveal is a doozy, and there’s a fun explanation for the face-peeling, as well as a bit of a supernatural element.
It’s all topped off with a classic, hokey final frame promising a sequel.
THE DEVIL’S HACKSAW (2025)
You really have to approach this one from the right perspective to appreciate it. There are loads of kills, dark themes, and grindhouse visuals that might make it seem like a serious film spoiled by a cheap, corny, low budget production. However, if you give it a chance instead of quickly giving up on it, it’s actually a playful slasher with plenty of humor and a dose of campy graphic novel elements.
The black and white animated opener alone sets up the tone as we learn of a killer abducting a bus full of children and then being thrown in an insane asylum.
Next, we see a killer in a straight-jacket and mask approach two girls parked in a jeep. I think they were speaking redneck, because I could barely understand them. They flash their tits, which of course means they’re just asking for it. It feels like a serious chase and kill scene, but the killer stroking his lead pipe and a comic book splash of blood that splatters the camera lens says otherwise.
Another cool, animated sequence reveals how the killer slaughtered the staff of the institution and escaped. After that, the numerous kills should make it clear this is comedy. For instance, the killer dumps gas on a mechanic who casually begs not to be torched, followed by the killer dancing giddily when he sets the mechanic on fire.
THAT is the vibe you have to go with to appreciate this one. It mostly bounces from kills (the killer even eats body parts at one point) and the local law enforcement investigating the scenes of each crime.
For the final act, the killer does what masked killers do best; he terrorizes a summer camp. Awesome. It’s a major massacre, he roasts eyes like marshmallows, and we get a long, final girl chase scene.
But perhaps my favorite moment of all is the final scene, in which the killer returns for Christmas.
And if I’m not mistaken, he targets a gay couple (again, redneck speak causes a language barrier, so I wasn’t sure).
