What are the chances there would be two movies about mutant pig people on Amazon Prime at the same time? They’re so slim I simply had to watch them both.
BARNEY BURMAN’S WILD BOAR (2020)
Think The Hills Have Eyes meets Planet of the Apes and you’ll know what you’re in for with this one.
After a weird stop motion intro, we meet a group of treasure hunters. They discuss a hot location that also happens to have a history of radiation, but they decide it’s safe these days…
They arrive at a derelict building in the middle of a desert area, they find a hole in the wall inside the building, one woman points out this would be a really bad idea in a horror movie…so they go in.
Within minutes, the pig people are hunting them down. This will be very familiar territory to horror veterans. It’s a commentary on how humans treat animals.
The focus is on one girl thrown into a cage full of mud, forced to watch as the others are handled like pigs at the slaughterhouse, and forced to eat against her will. Ugh. The “feeding” scene. Now that’s horror.
The film is quite gritty and grisly, and delivers on gore as the main girl attempts to make her escape, but it does start to lose steam in the second half, a problem that could have been rectified had the 109-minute runtime been trimmed down a bit. For a while the film stalls and I felt like I was watching a Star Wars spinoff about a family of Gamorrean Guards.
Refreshingly, there’s nothing predictable in the final act. However, it does get totally bizarre and a bit confusing as it heads for the good zinger ending.
BULLETS OF JUSTICE (2019)
I don’t even care that I once again didn’t understand what the hell was going on by the end of a mutant pig people movie, because the director of Re-Kill and Wrong Turn 6 gives us a gory grindhouse action horror flick that’s totally queer…I think. I just wish it had a better title. Hell, Sex Pigs would have been perfect.
Smartly running 79 minutes long (take note, Wild Boar), this film thrusts us right into the midst of the grindhouse zaniness. During World War 3, humans and pigs were mated for use as warriors…warriors that ended up being at the top of the food chain.
As our sexy main man and his mustached female sidekick try to find the location of the “mother” of the pig people, high-speed action sequences, dark humor, and surprisingly explicit sex scenes abound. Mmm…pig in a blanket.
Danny Trejo makes a fleeting, completely unnecessary cameo, and his appearance is completely forgotten by the time the good guys get to “the farm” where humans are harvested.
Bullets of Justice delivers on the gross-out goodness. And the queer stuff?
Our main man is obsessed with his own ass and highly jealous of a flamboyantly queer, long-haired pretty boy in a G-string that plays a major role in the plot and eventually does a provocative dance. You can almost smell the sexual tension between them. This definitely earns an honorary spot on the complete homo horror movies page.
