I never get tired of deadly dolls, so I added three more to my watchlists for a triple feature. Let’s see how that worked out for me.
ROB1N (2025)
A killer robot doll with a number in the name of his spelling. Has to be a M3GAN rip-off, right? Not really, beyond those little details. This is a much more atmospheric little killer doll flick.
It opens with a massacre at some kid’s birthday party.
Next, we meet a young, engaged straight couple. He suggests they go visit his estranged uncle. That works out well, because the uncle lives in a big house and apparently had a car accident a while back that wiped most of his memory. He doesn’t even remember any conflict with the nephew so invites them to stay.
It does turnout, however, that the uncle has built a robot likeness of his deceased son. And don’t you know, ROB1N is one jealous doll. He viciously kills anyone that gets between him and his maker.
Here’s the thing, though. While the doll and his blinking, glowing eyes are definitely creepy, I guess budget constraints forced the filmmakers not to animate ROB1N at all in full view. You mostly see him standing there staring blankly, then his eyes blink, then we see a weapon making contact with a victim.
Somehow, it actually works to some extent and delivers plenty of blood, but as a result of the lack of movement and the fact that ROB1N doesn’t speak, he really has no personality. His inability to ever be seen walking also makes for a pretty awkward final chase scene…
Despite that, this one has a clever twist that, along with the good kills and stylish filming, made this a satisfying killer doll movie for me.
MORGAN: KILLER DOLL (2025)
It’s a lesbian killer doll movie! Yay! More like a lesbian obsession killer doll movie.
Michael Pare is the father of Astrid, a very nice teen girl who walks with a cane but somehow hangs with a very snotty and douchey clique of friends.
Astrid reconnects with her childhood friend Darcy, who is weird, has an abusive father, is in therapy…and is ready to admit she has always been in love with Astrid.
For Astrid’s birthday, Darcy gives her a big, creepy doll. Astrid’s friends, who despise Darcy, find a love letter in the box, so they make Darcy well aware that she’s a freak and doesn’t stand a chance with Astrid.
And then the killing begins. Here’s the really crappy part. The Darcy doll has plenty of shitty people to kill, but her first victim is Astrid’s Black maid. It’s literally the only scene the woman is in. She comes to clean the house and gets viciously stabbed. WTF?
The Darcy doll is freaky because she fricking appears human-sized whenever she attacks people. Eek!
The death scenes are great, with spooky setup shots of the doll and violent, bloody kills, which is a plus, because this is a pretty generic slasher otherwise.
There’s a very satisfying twist in the final act, but the denouement goes on way too long with a lot of excessive talk, which seriously slows down the pacing at the last minute. I’d also like to know why the inside of Astrid’s house is lit in neon horror colors like something you would see in my Dan cave.
THE RULE OF JENNY PEN (2024)
This is a different kind of doll movie, because the doll is actually attached to John Lithgow’s arm like a puppet, and he uses it to terrorize fellow patients at a rest home, often forcing them to “lick her asshole”. WTF?
This is just a nasty, mean-spirited, “elevated” horror movie that also stars Geoffrey Rush as the protagonist who is most targeted by Lithgow and the only one who stands up to him.
Cruel torture includes pouring piss on patients, yanking out a catheter, a spit fight, pushing elderly people down, sending them off into the woods by themselves, and even sexual assault.
It’s one big metaphor for the possible horrors of living in an old folks home (isolation, abandonment, neglect, abuse), and while it does have a doll with glowing eyes and there are some symbolic scenes of the doll being gigantic, this is more a horrific movie than a horror movie. I wasn’t feeling it at all. I’ll stick to the trashy, low budget killer doll slashers, thank you very much.
