Let’s just get this over with.
BODIES BODIES BODIES (2022)
This film sort of reminded me of Sissy without a substantial slasher feel.
A rich lesbian takes her new girlfriend to a party weekend at the home of one of her wealthy friends, played by Pete Davidson. She almost immediately begins ignoring the new girlfriend, who feels like a total outsider.
Then they start playing a murder mystery game called Bodies Bodies Bodies. They also seem to simultaneously play a drinking game in which they slap the shit out of each other. I’m not sure if it’s part of the same game or they’re two different games, but the Bodies x3 game is the perfect springboard for a slasher. One person gets secretly anointed the killer, they turn out the lights, and then they run around in the dark in a sort of game of hide and seek.
Unfortunately, after only one round the game is totally forgotten. The lights actually go out, one person is found dead, and then everyone spends the rest of the movie roaming around in the dark looking for the person they think is the killer.
There is no slasher scenario, and this ends up feeling more like a Tucker and Dale situation with rich people in a mansion. Even though this is considered a black comedy horror, only one person gets any funny screen time.
Actress Rachel Sennott absolutely steals the show as they all turn on each other in the end, arguing about their relationships while throwing around trendy psychology buzz words. It’s ultimately a letdown, but worth watching for Rachel.
BRAINHUNTER: NEW BREED 1987 (2023)
A perpetual victim to advertising, I watched this one because they slapped “1987” onto the title. The date is irrelevant.
Even so, I could have appreciated this little gory indie if it had focused on the meat of the horror it had to offer rather than trying to give us a detective story as well.
With gnarly creature makeup and practical gore effects, the film should have delved into the basic plot—kids break into an abandoned building for the night and get terrorized and killed by a demon-zombie sort of brain eating humanoid.
Instead, the bulk of the film follows two detectives that team up to solve a murder case.
While the low budget is apparent in the horror sequences, it works perfectly in a direct-to-video way.
It doesn’t work when you just have a bunch of inexperienced actors trying to carry a detective story entirely with dialogue.
FAN BASE (2021)
This triple feature post had me a) wishing I hadn’t wasted my time on any of these movies, and b) writing about them just to remind myself later that I watched them.
Fan Base feels like the numerous meta fan films that are all over YouTube these days. This low budget movie in a nutshell—a big hillbilly gets angry when he doesn’t get the response he wants after meeting one of his favorite actors, and then goes on a killing spree on a horror movie set.
He spends a good amount of the movie killing people without any mask. 40 minutes in he dons a white jumpsuit and white mask. Are we supposed to suddenly be scared?
All the kill scenes are clumsy and amateurish and come across as a bunch of horror-loving kids playing pretend. The onset shenanigans just aren’t funny and serve mostly as filler…in a 63-minute movie. In an effort to keep us entertained, there are also references to famous horror movies.
You’ve seen it all before, done better. It’s just another movie about fan obsession. That’s right. I said fan, not stan. The word is fan, short for fanatic, not some dumb ass social media word fans have started to use to feel trendy—especially considering its inspired by an Eminem song from twenty years ago. Like, get with the times. Even Stan called himself a fan, not a stan….
