A trippy trio of horror flicks

If you like a little bit of a Twilight Zone twist and a head-scratching conclusion with your horror, then have I got a triple feature for you.

HOUSE HUNTING (2013)

1980s V and Beastmaster hunk Marc Singer is still around—at least, until he goes House Hunting. He takes his new woman and resentful daughter to see a house in the middle of nowhere. They quickly discover another family is there to check out the house. But instead of a bidding war to see who gets the house, it soon becomes a bidding war to see who can get away from it.

Yep. These two families are trapped in this house; any attempt to leave leads them right back to the house. And they seem to warm up to their fate oddly fast. Tensions run high. People begin to lose it. There are fights. Dirty little secrets are revealed. Ghostly apparitions haunt and taunt them, including a freaky thing in a scary white mask. The P.A. system has ominous messages for them.

And finally, it becomes a fight to the death. Do you think one person will figure out the solution to getting out? If you know your Twilight Zone style, you can pretty much guess the outcome.

DON’T BLINK (2014)

Don’t Blink has an awesome little concept that completely falls apart because the film fails to stick to its own rules. A group of friends goes to a mountain resort and finds the place is deserted. There’s also some totally irrelevant environmental stuff tossed in by observant characters that is simply never explained or tied to the main problem these friends have, which is…when you fall out of view of anyone, you completely disappear.

The first few times it happens, it’s really creepy. Even with half a dozen people in a room, if none of them is looking at you, you simply disappear. Eek! Unfortunately, dozens of times when this happens, characters don’t disappear, which leads to a game of “look who should have disappeared but didn’t” that totally detracts from the plot. Movie automatically ruined, so none of the many other ridiculous plot points is worth noting.

However, aside from Brian Austin Green’s ass, there are two reasons to watch—the performances by Joanne Kelly of Warehouse 13 and red hot Zack Ward of A Christmas Story, who has become quite the horror hunk these days.

It is absolutely absurd that Brian Austin Green and Mena Suvari get top billing plus the DVD cover of this film. Those honors should have gone to Joanne and Zack. Okay, and maybe Brian’s ass.

MINE GAMES (2012)

Mine Games is definitely my favorite of this mind-altering trio. While heading to a house in the woods to party, friends in a van accidentally drive off the road and get stuck in a ditch. They walk the short distance to the house and go on with their weekend as planned. Before long, they’ve stumbled upon an old mine in the woods.

One of the friends, a psychic medium, is terrified of the place, but no one takes her seriously because she is tripping on drugs when they go in. In fact, some of them aren’t even afraid to go back to the place. They all should be once they begin discovering some really fucked up shit in there. But any reports brought back to the house about craziness going on in the mine just make the others curious, concerned, and doubtful, so they keep returning to the mine to check it out! WTF?

Hey. Their dumb decisions might piss you off, but they sure make for one thrilling vicious cycle time loop flick that keeps you watching while delivering kills and plenty of twists. Not to mention, there is some delicious nudity—male and female—and a good old-fashioned pointless sex scene. And the final scene actually gives Mine Games a tidy ending, even if does leave us with a whole bunch of unanswered questions that will definitely have people talking (and bitching) on the message boards.

And did I mention the high cute guy count?