There was nothing new or original to see with my latest movie marathon, but there is some popcorn movie fun plus cheap thrills to be had with this trio.
DESERT SHADOWS (2022)
This odd little film is a creature feature with a hint of mystery, plenty of icky humanoid monster action, and an odd touch of campy horror now and then. If SyFy was still in the business of branding films as originals for its network, this could have been one of the better flicks in its roster.
A man in a desert wilderness enters a cave and is attacked by a giant creature that looks half alien and half praying mantis. Sure, it’s CGI, but it’s still also pretty cool.
That, however, is what makes this movie kind of confusing. This insectoid creature isn’t really the focus of the horror, gets very little screen time, and convolutes the actual plot.
The man from the desert gets away from the creature and believes it is what took his missing brother. He enlists the help of a college professor, who offers all kinds of conspiracy theories as to what the creature is.
As they investigate the mystery of the missing brother, they soon become embroiled with some freaky humanoid monsters.
Despite the film attempting to keep the truth of the matter mysterious and intriguing, this is a very predictable story. That doesn’t matter much, because the creatures, the kills, and the camp make this a good one for movie night with some friends.
BAG OF LIES (2024)
Despite being totally derivative, this is a fun little creepier if you just need some cheap horror filler between bigger titles.
This cute dude’s wife is dying, so he consults some witch doctor guy who tells him how to save her…using a ritual involving a big bag with something in it. But…you can’t look in, talk to, or touch the bag after the ritual is done. Eek!
The cute dude has a hot friend, and I so wished the wife would just die and that the guys would get together. Unfortunately, I didn’t write the script.
Instead, the hot friend kind of screws up because he doesn’t know the rules.
Pretty soon our husband is being terrorized by young women that just keep appearing around his house and going all Smile on his ass. Creepy. You could say the movie brings a whole new meaning to the term bag lady.
Much of the running time involves the husband being terrorized by these women. It sort of becomes a cat and mouse game. Cheap scares are high, body count is low.
Meanwhile, the sick wife starts getting weird, and this becomes somewhat of a metaphor for the struggle of caring for the dying and how death permeates every corner of your life, which is kind of sad.
As in all these types of movies, the main goal becomes for the husband to figure out how to stop these hauntings once and for all.
SÉANCE GAMES: METAXU (2024)
I liked the nostalgic feel of this one—it gives off 2001-2002 direct-to-DVD horror vibes. It feels like one of those cheap supernatural knockoffs of wider theatrical releases of the time.
Several social medial influencers are part of an online contest—they have to go to a haunted location and live stream a séance.
They arrive at an old hotel and discover the only person there is some hippie chick manager who doesn’t even know what the internet is.
A combination of geometric video graphics and black smoke serve as hints of a supernatural presence as they explore the place, telling you exactly the level of special effects you’re getting here.
They do a séance and a holographic ghost woman rises from the table. Then one of the girls sees the ghost of a friend who claims she was murdered and the murderer is in the hotel.
So this becomes a mystery ghost story with a little possession element thrown in for good measure. Eric Roberts appears in a flashback story about the ghosts, which should also tell you the level of quality you’re in for.
With 20 minutes left, the group has another séance, which is when the cheap, made-for-TV ghostly madness goes full throttle. Silly fun, but nothing you haven’t seen before.
