THE KILLER EYE (1999)
I expected nothing from The Killer Eye other than tons of hot young guys in tighty whities since it’s a David DeCoteau film. But I have to admit, I was mildly entertained by this dopey movie.
First of all, it runs only 72 minutes. Add 1 star. It is loaded with hot young guys in nothing but tight undies. Add 2 stars. There’s a giant killer eye that likes to rub its big tentacles all over women’s naked boobs. Minus 1 star. Just kidding.
The Killer Eye is actually a campy little film and one of DeCoteau’s more fun moments. Rather than focusing so heavily on the half-naked guys that he doesn’t even deliver a semi-entertaining or at least intentionally funny horror movie, he gives us a sexy-cheesy-funny b-movie that is more inline with the Full Moon Features style.
The plot is simple (shocker). There’s this crazy doctor scientist (shocker) who develops a way to see into another dimension (shocker). He experiments on a young man (shocker) who is a dead ringer for Ryan Phillippe, who was hot at that time in movies like 54 and Cruel Intentions. A giant eye is unleashed from the other dimension…and it’s horny for women!
That’s pretty much the plot—naked women getting fondled by a giant eye. For no good reason, there are a bunch of hot young men running around in their undies, the scientist’s wife is getting banged by all of them (2 at a time to provide DeCoteau’s trademark man-on-man copout), there’s a humorous dude named Creepy Billy, and together, they all must stop the giant killer eye!
It’s absurd and repetitive, but the cast is actually funny as they deliver their goofy dialogue. I mean, the fricking scientist at one point barks, “Curses!” I thought I was the only one who does that.
KILLER EYE: HALLOWEEN HAUNT (2011)
Charles Band, the man behind Full Moon Features, waited over 10 years to make a sequel, but I guess he was determined to rewrite the legacy of The Killer Eye by making a movie in which only naked women run around, dabble in lesbian antics, and dance for the killer eye.
And there you have it. The plot of Killer Eye: Halloween Haunt. Okay, so there’s some plot. This chick is decorating a house for Halloween and invites her hottest female friends over to help. Instead, they party, dig up old masks from movies like Killjoy, and find a copy of the film The Killer Eye on DVD.
They pop in the DVD, and before this movie is over, we’ll get to see a good 1/3 of the scenes from the original movie as the girls sit around mocking how bad it is and making digs at the sexuality of the cute men in the movie. Okay. This was actually the best part. It’s like Full Moon Features did a case study to see how people react when they sit around watching a Full Moon feature.
All the naked women and lesbianism aside, this feels more like a traditional horror movie, with all the cheap scares coming from the chicks jumping out at each other, some actual gore moments, chase scenes, and not one but two final girls!
Of course, none of that helps make it a better movie than the first. It’s equally as bad yet entertaining with a conflict of interests: naked boys vs. naked girls. And despite its name and a couple of Halloween masks, Killer Eye: Halloween Haunt fails to be worthy of my list of Halloween horror movies that don’t involve Michael Myers.
