I needed throwbacks to Crocodile and Crocodile 2 in my isolating life right now

I never would have imagined that by 2000, the man who brought us the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre would make a movie of SyFy original quality…which happens to be oodles of ridiculous fun that screams end of the 20th century.

Pretty people head out on a boat for spring break to the strains of pop rock that will catapult you back to the beginning of the millennium—unknown music reminiscent of the kind of stuff that packed the NOW CDs back then.

Same goes for the fact that all the boys look like they’re supposed to be in a boy band. 90s nostalgia is done…long live Y2k memories.

The kids catch some rays, we get to see boy butt…

…they tell campfire stories, there’s a little dog that constantly appears ready to be croc food…

and…the kids end up with a croc egg in their possession just like something out of Jurassic Park 3.

Croc attacks and single-serving kills are a load of fun if you gather some friends around for a movie marathon. The croc even seems to taunt the kids as it gobbles down their friends.

You’ll laugh, you’ll scream, you still won’t believe that Tobe Hooper made this movie. Except…it ends up kind of feeling like a remake or re-imagining of Tobe’s Eaten Alive!

Tobe isn’t back for Crocodile 2: Death Swamp from 2002, but the big time croc chomping is. This sequel is handled by Gary Jones, director of Jolly Roger, Boogeyman 3, and Axe Giant.

The story is totally different. Armed robbers hold up a bank, get on a plane, create major chaos in the air, and cause the plane to crash land in a swamp.

What I’m saying is it takes quite a while before the croc comes out to play (about 30 minutes). But once it does, it’s feeding time, and there’s plenty on the menu. And even some scissor sister action…

The good guys and bad guys battle it out in the swamp, and the leader of the robbers pre-dates Samuel L. Jackson’s Snakes on a Plane attitude by like four year, and Janet Jackson’s nip slip by two.

He has no patience for everyone getting gulped down nonstop.

Adding a little more excitement to the mix, the boyfriend of the main girl comes looking for her with the help of 80s hunk and Ralph Macchio nemesis Martin Kove.

The men might not get shirtless like the boys did in the first film, but there’s something very sensual about their interactions.

About Daniel

I am the author of the horror anthologies CLOSET MONSTERS: ZOMBIED OUT AND TALES OF GOTHROTICA and HORNY DEVILS, and the horror novels COMBUSTION and NO PLACE FOR LITTLE ONES. I am also the founder of BOYS, BEARS & SCARES, a facebook page for gay male horror fans! Check it out and like it at www.facebook.com/BoysBearsandScares.
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