When bad things happen to boys in their happy birthday suits

happy birthday cover

White boys are always going off to Mexico for women, booze, sex, and trouble, which is why Mexico should be building the wall and making Trump pay for it. But that’s another story. In 2016 flick Happy Birthday, Matt Bush of Piranha 3DD and Rob Zombie’s Halloween II heads to Mexico to celebrate his birthday with his best buddy. And as usual, when straight boys go on a road trip, bad things happen.

happy birthday bloody windshield

We’ll get to that. First, there’s an odd combination of anti-gay/anti-trans comments and admissions to and demonstrations of experiences in both realms. Anyway, the boys get their party on with some local “tour guides,” including cutie Erik Palladino of Dead & Breakfast.

happy birthday balls 1

Then they get together with two nice girls they meet, one of them played by Vanessa Lengies, who was on the kiddie horror show Are You Afraid of the Dark years ago and was more recently the rich chick who couldn’t sing on Glee.

happy birthday girls

Turns out these two nice girls aren’t so nice. The boys are drugged and when they come to, they’re in their underwear and tied to the beds, and the girls are throwing a party…for a bunch of big, burly, horny guys.

happy birthday big guys 1

Matt Bush’s back bush is in trouble when a black dildo appears on the scene and one of the guys begins to unzip…

happy birthday big guys 2

Before long, Matt is separated from his buddy and has to try to figure out a way to either escape or convince the girls to let him go. The movie has some suspenseful moments, but is notably tame despite the predicament in which Matt finds himself.

happy birthday escape

The gay and trans stories Matt and the girls share as he tries to befriend them are pretty much more shocking than anything that actually happens in the film. There’s also a rather odd shift in tone for a while near the end when Steven Tyler of Aerosmith shows up to add some humor to the mix.

happy birthday steve tyler

It’s entertaining for sure, but be warned—the plot takes a turn that might really piss you off…not to mention, it’s not anything you haven’t seen before. To make up for it, we do get to see Matt Bush run around in perfect fitting undies for a majority of the film.

happy birthday butt 1

Director/writer Casey Tebo has made a pretty tricky film here. It gay baits. It straight bates. It torture porn baits. It exploitation baits. It horror baits! But fuck if every single one of us baters isn’t going to take the bait and watch his movie, so he wins. And speaking of gay baiting directors, if you like your bears big and bushy, take a gander at Tebo.

happy birthday director casey tebo

About Daniel

I am the author of the horror anthologies CLOSET MONSTERS: ZOMBIED OUT AND TALES OF GOTHROTICA and HORNY DEVILS, and the horror novels COMBUSTION and NO PLACE FOR LITTLE ONES. I am also the founder of BOYS, BEARS & SCARES, a facebook page for gay male horror fans! Check it out and like it at www.facebook.com/BoysBearsandScares.
This entry was posted in Johnny You ARE Queer - Gay Thoughts, Movie Times & Television Schedules - Staying Entertained, The Evil of the Thriller - Everything Horror and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.