More than a rip-off of Piranha, the 1979 flick Killer Fish is almost more a rip-off of The Deep, only without one of few really bad Donna Summer disco songs as a theme. But don’t worry. There’s plenty of bad faux disco music in the background during this flick.
And honestly, I couldn’t help watching it and thinking that more than anything, it’s an episode of The Six Million Dollar Man minus the awesome fitch-chit-chit-chit-chit sound effects. Gorgeous Lee Majors (his beauty is really beyond compare), James Franciscus (better known as the better looking version of Charlton Heston from Beneath the Planet of the Apes), Karen Black, and a bunch of other people steel some gems in a scene that goes on for like the first 20 minutes of the movie.
Next, they all sort of lounge around this island, while model Margaux Hemingway and her big fat effeminate photographer show up. Lee flirts with Margaux, pushes her in the pool, then flirts with the photographer and pushes him in the pool. Hearing Lee Majors talk to his new love interest about gays and bisexuality is one of the hottest parts of the film.
Once in a while, there’s a scene of someone getting pulled into the water and leaving a trail of bloody bubbles behind, but not much happens and the 1970s cheese level is high. Finally, everyone ends up on a sinking boat together and realizes there are piranha in the water.
The underwater piranha scenes are surprisingly good, you get to see Steve Austin’s bionic legs bleed, all the guys are hot and often shirtless, the big fat queen is guaranteed a humiliating death, and Karen Black is her usual weird self. What more could you ask for? Add this one to a triple feature with the original two Piranha movies and you have one crappy late 70s/early 80s triple feature.
You want some of this chum, bitches?