I simply had to see it. I had to know. Bruce La Bruce’s “art film” L.A. Zombie is a horror porno. Like a really uber-gory horror porno. This zombie creature that comes from the sea, played by the luscious porn star Francois Sagat, spends the whole time bringing dead bodies back to life by having sex with them.
The zombie initially gets picked up by some guy in a car, there’s an accident, and a seriously traumatizing necrophilia scene takes place. I was pretty sure this was going to be an hour and 45 minutes I wouldn’t get through. Our gruesome zombie with huge fricking fang teeth screws the other guy in the open chest cavity with his deformed wiener and shoots this black gunk all over him. This brings the guy back to life, he bends over the crashed vehicle…and we learn that even zombies practice safe sex (What do you want? It’s a porno).
As gross and shocking as this opening scene is, as the zombie continues finding dead bodies in L.A. and screwing them back to life, the real Francois Sagat appears more often and his partners are less and less dead. There are just flickering moments of images of the actual zombie and some blood. So the film becomes essentially a straight up gay porno, and a pretty vanilla one at that. But that first scene is a doozy that would make any exploitation filmmaker of the 70s drop his head in shame.
As the film comes to a close, there is an orgy with some of the hottest, most muscular and hairy porn stars in the business. Then, to bring back the horror, there’s a blood bath and the zombie moseys on over to a cemetery.
I don’t even really know what else to say about L.A. Zombie. From a horror perspective, it’s SERIOUSLY repulsive. The zombie is wicked cool in my opinion; Sagat’s flawless body is painted in these eerie neon colors and his teeth and face are the stuff of nightmares.
And even though I myself write gay erotic horror, I got all prudish seeing sex and horror so tightly intertwined in a motion picture. Icky. Like I would never watch this film if I was in the mood for a porno. And it’s too gross to be enjoyable as a horror film. I think you watch it just to challenge yourself and see if you can stomach it. It’s literally hardcore to the bone: hardcore horror movie and hardcore porno.